It’s a fair question. Why should you have coaching? I mean you have been in relationships all your life, right? You are an “expert”, am I right?
Here is my question…are you happy? Does your life occur as a joyful life in a context of abundance? Are you satisfied with your relationship?
Lets examine the following question. What are some things that you were not actually taught in life that you were just expected to know?
Lets start by asking that question about love. Do you KNOW how to love someone? In reality, learning how to love starts as something we organically pick up in the family we were raised in. It’s not like we had a choice about which family we got born into. In childhood we watch our parents, our relatives and friends. Then as adults, our dysfunctional love learning interacts with our partners dysfunctional love learning and “love” is reduced to hoping that your demons play nicely with her demons (or visa versa).
We get married as a promise…It occurs as a threat though…till death do you part. With stars in our eyes, we have children. And while there is some coaching and training through the pregnancy for the birthing process and even the birth itself, you go home with a bundle and the only real thought you are having at the time is “Shit, I hope I don’t kill this thing” because, if you are honest, you really have no idea how to care for another human being.
That phase actually lasts your whole life. Because there is no manual that teaches “here is how you care for children from birth through death”. I mean there are books and podcasts and so on offering tips and tricks and strategies – like the book “How To Get Your Kids To Eat, But Not Too Much”. Almost every movie is about how a parent and a child are estranged…(“A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood” is a perfect example).
And of course how do you adult – as a grown person with a partner and kids and job, and how do you manage all those competing attentions on your time and energy?
Its no wonder that the divorce rate is 50%, the suicide rate is the highest in 28 years, and the alcoholic rate is almost 13% – something is missing.
Let me ask you a few questions…
- Do you know how to gain courage?
- Do you know how to be confident?
- Do you know how to restore a lost relationship?
- Do you know how to love?
- Do you know how to be loved?
- Do you know how to be happy?
- Do you know how to be joyful?
- Do you know how to be content?
- Do you know how to be related?
My point is that we learn and model most of these things from our families and from popular culture, we really do not have mastery in any real sense of the word.
So what does coaching offer? Why do I need a coach at all?
A coach is like having an accountability partner who also knows the way forward. A coach stretches you. A coach helps you discover your path forward so that you master the terrain. A coach has a coaching plan. A coach is process oriented, and at the same time, a coach is not attached to the outcome although the outcome is the goal. All athletes, even the best athletes have coaches. Not to teach them the basics, but because the coach can see what is hidden from view. They can point out to the athlete being coached what they see and what the athlete does not. And they can help the athlete discover what is missing so they can master the task. That is how an athlete improves even when they are at the top of their game. Because self improvement is always possible.
Business executives have coaches. Many people have life coaches. Being coached is how successful people get their life in order. The reasons people choose a coach are many…
- Do you have trouble following through with goals? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Do you have beliefs that limit your progress and hold you back? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Do you simply not know where to begin? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Are anxiety and stress recurring themes? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Are you unclear about your vision? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Is your current relationship in disarray? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Has the passion you had for life dissipated? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Are you easily sidetracked by time wasting activities? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Are your friends and family not on board with your dreams? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
- Are you completely lost and feeling hopeless? …YOU MIGHT NEED A COACH.
Here are some reasons NOT to hire a coach…
- You want to be told what to do. This is not what coaches do. Coaches coach, not tell.
- You believe life is “good enough” – if that’s your point of view, then being coached is pointless. You have to be coachable to make coaching worthwhile.
- You hate change. Coaching might cause you to be uncomfortable. Coaching isn’t stroking. Transformation requires change.
- You don’t want to pay.Then coaching is not available to you. Coaching is a professional service. No pay means no coaching.
- You don’t want to improve your relationships. If this is your reason to not consider relationship coaching, then you are missing out on what the biggest advantage is of relationship coaching.
- You would rather hold grudges or resentments toward loved ones, then coaching is not for you.
For the sake of argument, lets say you are considering coaching.
Is your relationship perfect? Are you in alignment with your partner? Is your sexuality fully self-expressed? Are you living life powerfully? Are you truly free?
People who participate in coaching experience the following:
- Self Confidence
- Courage in the face of adversity
- Dramatically improved relationships
- Warmer friendships
- Warm loving relationships
- Happiness and Joyfulness
- Connection with loved ones
As lifetime transformation coaches, we invite you to explore whats possible for you.
To learn more visit Lady Petra and explore Lady Petra Playground.